You give your wife a peck on the cheek and walk out the door. Before you’ve even driven around the corner, you’ve texted your girlfriend, looked at the hot lingerie photos she sent you, and started a Web search for local hotels with good rates for the day. Welcome to cheating in the 21st century.
But there’s a dark side to technology for cheating, too. As you proceed on the way to your secret date, you’ve walked past a dozen cameras and your every move is being recorded by the GPS in your cell phone and your car. If you’re having an affair, is technology your ally, or your enemy?
How can technology help cheaters get together?
Back in the day, adultery just kind of happened. Your co-worker would be bending over the copy machine and you’d get thoughts and you’d go and lift 150 pounds of copy paper for no apparent reason and then she’d get thoughts and it would all go downhill from there. The only way to actually plan to have an affair would be to sneak out to sleazy night spots hoping to hook up for a one-night stand. Technology has changed all that.
It started with the dating sites. Places like OK Cupid and Match.com started getting inundated with an unexpected type of customer—the married man or woman looking to cheat on their spouse. The allure was the same as it was for single people—you can find your perfect playmate almost tailor-made for you. Some of these sites started banning openly married people, while others embraced it and added “Married” or “Available” as a choice.
The next wave of online dating sites was much more open about cheating activity. These hookup sites give you plenty of options if you’re “Seeking discreet companionship” or a “No strings attached” (NSA) encounter. In fact, some of these sites are marketed directly to married individuals looking to play around. With seemingly infinite characteristics from which to choose, you will have no problem at all using these sites to find the cheating man who loves classical music as much as you do…and has an eleven-inch penis.
How can technology help you maintain a cheating relationship?
Maintaining a relationship is all about communication, but how do you communicate with your lover when nobody is supposed to know that you’re intimate or, in some cases, that you even know each other? In the past, this was very difficult, with carefully timed phone calls and love letters sent to P.O. boxes and such. Now, it’s technology to the rescue.
Cell phones are perhaps the biggest innovation to adultery since the condom. Now you can call, text, or “sext” your cheating partner when you’re at home alone, at work, or even on the way to the no-tell motel. You can even get prepaid temporary phones that have no connection to you whatsoever, so your anonymity is always protected.
Email is another technological innovation that plays a huge part in modern cheating. Sending an email, even a really raunchy email, is something you can usually do in full view of other people without them knowing what you’re writing about, even at work. There are services that provide relatively anonymous email addresses that make it harder to trace, as well.
For those who want to take it to the next technological level, there is erotic chat, webcams, and video calls with services like Skype, all of which can be used in the realm of “cybersex” with your partner.
How can technology get you caught cheating?
Technology giveth and technology taketh away—if you’re not careful, the same technology you use to start or maintain your affair can cause you to get caught with your pants down. Remember those lovely devices you relied on for communication with your fornicating friend―the cell phone and the computer? They both leave traces of where you’ve been and what you’ve been doing.
The cell phone will keep a record of calls and texts made and received, so even if you’re not stupid enough to save your lover’s name under “JuicyBooty4Me” in your contacts, if your spouse finds your phone and sees that you call the same number every time she goes to work, you might just get busted. Even if you religiously delete texts and call logs, there can still be a record of them on your monthly bill if you don’t have a prepaid phone. Another danger with the cell phone is that your lover could call you when your spouse is close enough to hear their loving words of endearment.
The computer is another device that can get you busted pretty easily. Not only do you have to worry about deleting old emails from your lover, but you also have to worry about “cookies” and your browsing history, which can show a nosy spouse if you’ve been visiting certain hookup websites.
If your spouse is actively looking to see if you’re cheating, technology can really be a problem. There are programs that can monitor your computer use, GPS trackers for your car, mini spy cams, and any number of other “James Bond” style gadgets that can show your beloved what you’re really up to when you’re out late at night.
Technology is the ultimate double-edged sword when it comes to having an affair. It can help you to meet someone who is “doable,” and it can help you stay in touch with them and arrange your trysts, but it can also leave a trail that will get you caught. The lesson here is probably to use technology, but remember to delete, erase, and eradicate every shred of evidence when you’re done.